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Ex-Girlfriends are Hard to Win Back

Possibly the hardest girl to get are the ones you have had before, an ex-girlfriend. It isn’t everyone or all the time that a man wants an ex back but when they do, they will have to work hard to achieve getting her back. She will already know your best pick-up lines and be immune to them.

She will also know many of your bad habits and so you must be able to make her look past those or perhaps even change some of them if necessary.

One of the biggest problems is they may know that once they become your girlfriend, you show less interest in them, taking them for granted and so that is something you should remember if you do succeed in winning them back.

Often a girl may think that the romance went from the relationship and so you should be prepared, not just to be romantic whilst winning her back, but to keep a trace of romance in the following renewed relationship.

Especially if you hadn’t been romantic in the previous relationship you had with her, what can work well is offering to take them for a romantic candlelit dinner or to the countryside for a picnic with just the two of you.

Never bring up the past no matter how many good times you may have had as, recent studies have shown that this just results in them also remembering the bad times, the times that made them want to break up with you the first time.

Progress by talking of the future, a future that is bright with the two of you together, perhaps speak of romantic weekends away, perhaps even to the capital of romance, Paris.

Although she may at first be skeptical, if you really want her back, you will find a way of convincing her that you are serious and want the relationship to be romantic as much as she does.

In the course of doing all this though, there are three things that you must never do and those are beg, threaten or talk of the past. Women do not like to see men beg, pets yes but not men.

When a woman sees that a man has to resort to begging in order to get something they want, the woman loses respect for that man and so any hope of a lasting relationship will immediately be lost, even if it did initially work.

The same can be said for the use of threats either to her or to yourself. Threats may work at first and win her back but it will only be through feelings of pity or fear and so any relationship based on either of those is already doomed to failure.

As mentioned earlier, the past is to be avoided in conversation as it may bring up memories of bad times as well as good and those bad times may out do the good in her mind as after all, she did finish with you once already.

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Problems with Ex-Girlfriends

One problem many men have found with ex-girlfriends is, if they want one back it is very hard to do.

It would usually be far easier to get a new girlfriend than get an old one back as they know all your pick up lines, your little whimsical sayings and jokes and will not be fooled with promises that you never kept the last time. Still it is possible to do but it will not be easy.

First we’ll go through the things you shouldn’t do. The very first thing you must do is be sure that you want that girl back and that isn’t just a lack of female company you miss. If it is just female company you miss, go out and find a new girlfriend as that will be easier. So you’ve decided that this is the girl for you and so you are prepared to do anything to get her back.

Although you may be prepared to do anything to win her back, there are two things you definitely must not do and that is beg or threaten. If you beg or threaten or, in fact if you threaten to do anything to yourself, you will never win her back for good.

Okay she may come back at first but it would only be because she pitied you are had sympathy for you, perhaps she was even afraid for herself or you but she wouldn’t have come back for love as she would have lost all respect for you as a man.

To girls pets may look cute when they beg but men certainly do not. If you hope for the new relationship to last, she will have to come back to you for other reasons than pity or sympathy. One other thing that many man do which is a mistake, is bring up the old times.

Although there may have been some times when you were good together, bringing-up the past may also bring to her mind some of the not so good times and therefore work against your interests. So knowing what not to do, let us now look at what you need to do to win the girl back.

First of course you are almost certainly going to have to apologize, even if you are not quite sure it is you are apologizing for.

You will then have to show her you have changed; not just tell but show her some way in which you have changed. Instead of talking about the past, talk about the future and all the good times you could have, if you were back together.

Often a couple break up because the girl thinks the romance has gone and so that is probably what you need to reintroduce.

Suggest a candle lit dinner or perhaps a quite weekend away in the country where you can be alone to discuss what all you could do together if just she would take you back. If you do win her over, remember you want her back for the long term and so keep up the romance.

Picking up an Old Flame

One of the hardest girls you will ever have to pick up in your life is an old flame, an old girlfriend, an ex. Whether or not she was easy to pick up the first time, second time around, you are going to have your work cut out and even then you may not succeed.

Therefore before you even try, you should be certain that you want her back as sometimes things happen for the better. If however, you are sure that she is the girl for you and no other girl replace her, only then give it a try.

Whatever the reason was that you broke up, you will have to apologize and if she thinks she is the one that played a part in the break up, let her know you truly forgive her. More often than not, part of the breakup will be due to you not changing your ways and so you must be prepared to show that you have changed.

I say show her because it is very doubtful that she will just take your word for it, you will have to find a way to convince her that you have changed. If she thinks the romance had gone from your relationship then you will have to reintroduce it.

This may mean taking her out for an intimate meal but you may have a better chance if you suggest a romantic weekend away for just the two of you. Perhaps to somewhere where you can take walks through the fields or woods, perhaps a sunlit walk on a beach.

If you really want to be adventurous, perhaps suggest a weekend away together in Paris, the city where romance was born. One of these, especially if you had never thought to mention them before, may win her over, convincing her that you really have changed and changed for the better.

Of course though you will have to see through on your suggestions and may have to find other things to keep the romance alive if you want to keep her.

Whilst on one of these promised rendezvous, you should never mention any part of the past you had together, not even the good times as that may cause her to remember some of the bad times as well so, instead of mentioning the past, mention the future and all the things you have planned for the two of you if only she would take you back.

I know this may be a lot but I did warn you that getting her back would not be easy and that you should only try if you were certain it is what you wanted.

If it is what you wanted though and all this works, you know it would have been worth it and so try not to let a breakup happen again as getting her back a second time is something you do not even want to hear about what all is needed.

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Working to Get Your Ex Back

Getting an ex-girlfriend back usually involves a lot more work than finding a new girlfriend would but, if that is what you want you’ll be prepared for the extra effort. If you want an old girlfriend back, due to the effort it will take to succeed, it should only be for the right reasons.

If you just miss having a female’s company, perhaps a new girlfriend is a better solution or if you just want one more night in the sack, perhaps their easier options than trying to get the ex.
The only right reason for wanting an ex-girlfriend back is because you have genuine feelings for her and now realize that she is the one you want a lasting relationship with and there lies the problem.

It may be far easier to just get her back for one quick night as begging or threatening may achieve that but to get her back with true feelings for you is not so easy. When a man uses begging or threats to get an old girlfriend back, they may be successful as she may return to them through pity or fear but both of those emotions are short lived and the long term effect will be that she loses all respect for you, eliminating any further chance of a prolonged romance.

It is because you can’t use being or threats that makes winning an ex back so difficult. Your next first reaction may be to remind her of your past together but that apparently is the wrong way to go as talk of the past also rekindles memories of your bad times together and that could do more harm than good, so your work is really going to be hard.

It is therefore widely thought that the best method of getting an old girlfriend back, is to talk of the future, a future that both of you can share, one which is full of romance and all the things you know she likes.

Getting to tell her about your future together, over a candle-lit dinner would be a eat advantage or perhaps whilst walking with you through the park. These two things would be particularly effective if they are things you haven’t done with her in the past, displaying your ability to change.

Of course offering to take her away for a weekend in Paris would also be greatly beneficial, especially if she accepted. Paris, the home of romance, is said to be able to melt any woman’s heart and so as long as you are able to keep her your sole object of attention whilst you are there, your future with her could be secured.

Of course there are other ways to win an ex back but apologizing will always be a major part of any strategy that works, as will ensuring that she knows you forgive her for any mistakes she may have made. Remember it all about your future and so keep the future at the heart of your conversations, not the past.

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How to Court an Ex

It certainly isn’t unusual for a man to want and get an ex-girlfriend back but as any of them that have done so will tell you, it is no easy task and in fact most of them say it would probably have been easier to get a new girlfriend than it was winning their ex back.

Obviously in order for them to go through the trials and tribulations involved in winning back an old girlfriend, they thought it was worth it. Many of us at one time or another may have wished we could have gotten back an old flame but failed miserably in our attempts.

Apparently the reason why we probably failed is because we went winning them back in the wrong way. Although begging and threatening may seem like a good idea at the time, if we did that there is little wonder that we failed as those are the two worse things we could have done.

Even though these tactics are commonly employed by men wanting their exes back, if they have any success at all that success is short liven as the women will have only returned due to feelings of pity or fear, neither of which last and so the girl soon leaves again.

Another common mistake made by many men is that they remind the girl of their past together, mentioning all the good times they shared and whilst, to me, this still sounds a reasonable thing to do, the experts say differently.

According to the experts, although mentioning the good times will bring memories of those good times back, all too often they also bring back memories to the girl of the bad times you spent together. This means that all three of these methods of getting an old girlfriend back are doomed to failure from the start and that is why most of us failed.
The ones that did succeed in gaining back their old girlfriends apparently employed different methods, methods which included apologizing and only talking of the future they could have together, ignoring the past.

It is also thought that in many of the successes, an element of romance was also introduced, perhaps a candle-lit dinner for two or a weekend away in some remote cottage or hotel where they could take peaceful walks in the woods or along an empty beach.

Of course there may even have been some that went even further, taking their exes to places like Paris where romance is always in the air or to Venice for a quiet romantic boat ride on a gondola along one of the many canals.

One thing that is certain though, is it will take more than just a phone call to win back an ex and so if you are considering trying, before you do, first be certain that the ex is the girl for you and no substitute will do. We may not feel like we will get over her but in time all of us do.